Give them to me
My least favorite form of street harassment is when a guy asks why I’m not smiling. It’s related to that: Women aren’t allowed to be quiet or stoic or shy—or, hell, just in a bad mood—without being criticized. Women are bitchy and frigid if we don’t seem accessible at all times, for the most part to men. We’re supposed to be perpetually friendly. Who wants to live up to that? And seriously, when was the last time you heard a quiet woman described as “deep”?
Men who are serious are just that—serious. Think laconic cowboys and Clint Eastwood-style movie heroes. Strong and silent is a desirable personality trait for men—women, not so much. Because where silence in men is seen as strength, silence in women (if not seen as bitchy) is seen as weakness—she’s shy, a wallflower.
Jessica Valenti, He’s a Stud, She’s a Slut, and 49 Other Double Standards Every Woman Should Know (via savannahkitten)
One that I get ALL THE TIME and really hate: “Hey miss! You dropped something!”
Me: moment of panic where I search around desperately.
Oh fuck off.
I often here people try to excuse this as the person just trying to be nice, but would that person say the same thing to a guy? Because I have never heard it said to a guy, so there must be some reason they direct it towards women; they obviously want something. And a nice gesture is not something done to try to get something. It is done because it is a nice thing to do. Also, if you suspect someone is feeling sad or upset or whatever, the nice thing to do would be to try to cheer them up, not tell them to smile. Telling them to smile is just making commands like you are trying to control them.
Uh. I always ask someone, regardless of gender, if they’re feeling okay if they aren’t smiling and usually they do. I’ve also had women tell me to smile when I’m having a day like today.
Let’s not turn every social interaction into dick waving.
"You’ve lost something."
"Fuck you patriarchal scum."
which one of the people in this conversation sounds crazy